Bike Construction

I got a bicycle for my birthday and I couldn't be more pleased. I asked and received exactly what I wanted: city cruiser.

No gears, old school, hard to pedal. Big wide handle bars. Even managed to talk the guy at the sporting goods store down about $50 buckaroos (I'm cheap, you know).

Then came the fun part. It was like Christmas in March (not in a good way). I had to put the thing together...

The bike (above) in the box fresh from the store.

You would think that putting a bicycle together would be pretty straight forward. You would be mistaken. First off, the directions were written in fourteen different languages so despite the fact that in essence there was only 1/2 a page of directions, the entire booklet (including a whole legal section on safety) was about 80 pages.

Jeff (above) attempting to decipher the indecipherable.

Secondly, the book gave me instructions on things to put together that were already together and didn't provide directions on things that were apart. For example, it told me how to put the handle bars together (already together), but didn't bother to instruct me on how to hook it to the bike (I guessed). It showed me how to put a rear fender on the bike that was totally different than the fender in the box. It showed me how to hook the kick-stand to the bike (already hooked on) but nothing about the pedals (which were off). There was also a bag of screws with no directions as to where they went or how they fit into the big scheme of things.

As far as I got putting the bike together (above) before I was hopelessly confused.

I'm hoping to have this put together by the summertime but my hope is fading. Correction, I hope to have it put together properly by summertime. I'm already riding it, it is already rattling & wobbling and I'm pedaling it as fast as I can get it to go. Happy birthday to me!