BET 2010 Awards Predictions!

I predict for the 5th year in a row that I will not attend, watch, or pay attention to the BET Awards. In many, many ways, more ways than I can describe, it is totally out of every demographic I believe I am a member of.

I predict I will be watching Food TV at the time.

I wish all of the participants the best of luck. You may now continue on with your life.

Uncool Oscar Predictions - 2010

I live in Hollywood, this is a movie town. I get it. I love the movies! I love going to the movies and renting movies and buying DVD's and watching all kinds of movies in all kinds of genres in many different eras. That doesn't mean I have to spend six hours in front of a television bored out of my skull. Of course, that does not stop me from making "informed" predictions. I've been amazingly accurate the past few years on these things so I'd be sure to take a close look:

Best Supporting Actress
This is one of those east coast/west coast things that my east coast friends find strange, but live events like this come on at 5:00pm. It's still light out. It's a Sunday. I have a life to lead with four boys and a couple of nephews who like to play games. Usually this award is given right at the top of the show.
Prediction: I predict I'll be playing driveway hockey during this award.

Best Supporting Actor
By the time they get around to this award, the ovens will be ablaze, filled with baking breads & pies, potatoes will be well mashed, the roast beast will be resting prior to carving, and the whole family will be joined hand-in-hand for our dinner prayer.
Prediction: I predict I'll be eating dinner during this award.

Best Actor
Every Sunday is the same. A flurry of showers, whining, last minute homework, screaming, crying and chaos. And just as I'm getting ready to perhaps crack a beer and calm my nerves, my wife will take a quick peek in the cupboard and say something along the lines of, "You know, we're out of _________".
Prediction: I predict I'll be at Vons buying milk, bread and lunch meat during this award.

Best Actress
I expect that we will have everyone corralled well enough to catch our favorite Sunday activity, watching TV. What family would be complete without a Sunday night around the tube, bonding, learning about each other, and generally being "one"? It is at this point that we may find ourselves wondering what the heck that awards show is on ABC.
Prediction: I predict I'll be watching The Amazing Race during this award.

Best Director
Once that family bonding time known as watching TV has ended, it becomes necessary to get four boys and an nephew to go to bed. They are boys. They are genetically predestined to agitate each other beyond belief. Even if I tell them, "don't agitate each other or you are ALL punished", they still agitate and fight and shove and tease and annoy each other. Feelings are hurt, tempers flare. It's as regular as clockwork.
Prediction: I predict I'll be screaming at my boys at the top of my lungs during this award.

Best Picture
Growing up as a kid, you were lucky to catch the best picture award. It was always after midnight or 1am and really, really, late. Now that I'm on the west coast and I'm much older, the award still comes on late. It could be 9:00 or 9:30 before they announce that thing. This is the easiest prediction of them all.
Prediction: I predict I'll be fast asleep when this award is announced.

I look forward to looking at all the pictures and reading about all the winners on Monday morning on the internet.

2010 Grammy Awards Predictions - Uncool Version

My awards show predictions are uncannily accurate over the years. It seems that I am well intuned to what is going on in the culture at large despite my uncool status. So without further adeiu...

Grammy Prediction #1 - I will NOT watch the Grammy Awards yet again. That keeps my current streak at 45 consecutive Grammy Awards telecasts that I've missed. I wouldn't want to jinx it. Heaven forbid if I actually enjoyed watching it.

Grammy Prediction #2 - During the Grammy Awards, I'll probably watch Star Trek. Going through the original series now that the special efx have been upgraded.

Grammy Prediction #3 - It being Sunday night, I'll probably eat a pretty big dinner.

Jeff's Uncool Predictions for 2010

Every year beginning with this one, I have issued an annual list of predictions for the coming year.

Prediction #1 - I will NOT watch American Idol

Prediction #2 - I will NOT watch 'The Oscars', 'The Emmy's', 'People's Choice Award', 'MTV Music Awards', 'MTV Movie Awards', 'BET Awards', 'The Tony Awards', 'Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards', 'The ESPY's', etc. There's always a chance, so I never say never, but my record has been pretty strong the past five or six years at avoiding all of this.

Prediction #3 - I will turn up on television someplace this year. I have one thing shot that I'm pretty sure will air and there's a good chance I'll be on but I'm thinking this might another banner year.

Prediction #4 - My ice maker in the freezer will continue to only make one batch per day until March when it will stop even doing that.

Prediction #5 - I will forget I made any of these predictions by next week.

BET - Awards Tonight! My predictions

I have no idea who is going to win. I am completely unfamiliar with the nominees (for the most part). I have not been invited to any after-parties. With this in mind...

I predict I will NOT watch the BET awards, and that prediction WILL be correct.